It’s our party we can do what we want to

Bangerz Outfit Details

Miley Cyrus gets a lot of hate. See Twitter, Instagram, Youtube or any article mentioning her name and the comments and replies will be riddled with it.

Imagine, for a moment, that you are standing in the centre of a room. In the room there are thousands of people, all looking at you, all seeing you, all judging you, only you can’t see them. They are faceless and they are nameless. One by one they yell

“You are disgusting!”

“You’re overrated”

“You act and look like an ass”

“What a disgrace”

“What a disgusting creature”

“Why do people even bother talking to you?”*

*actual comments random people on the internet have made re Miley

Close your eyes and really imagine what that would feel like. Could you handle it?

I can’t even handle when a server at a restaurant doesn’t greet me with a smile. Did I do something wrong? Do they think I’m rude/a bitch/ a snob? I think that’s why the last time I posted anything on here was months ago. Even though I am excited to write things (I have a million ideas and drafts and notes lying around) I find myself gritting my teeth with anxiety over what OTHER PEOPLE will think. But if Miley can keep on keepin’ on despite being called a fugly whore skank every five minutes, I should be able to handle people I don’t know and/or like not liking and/or caring about what I write, right?

This wasn’t really supposed to be about cyber bullying though, or indeed about “those who mind don’t matter, those who matter don’t mind” – these are important things to discuss and to remember, but I actually wanted to talk about Bangerz.

Miley’s Bangerz tour came to Australia over the weekend and I was there with two of my bffs, Tessa and Ashlea. We dressed up in fluro and sequins. Tessa and Ashlea brought wigs to throw on stage for Miley.

I knew Miley was going to make a grand entrance, the one when she slides down her own tongue, but nothing could have prepared me for just how epic it would be. Miley’s huge face slowly rolls up on the projector, her eyes spin around the room. I’m not a crazy fan of Miley’s but I am having heart palpitations. As her mouth gets closer to the centre of the screen there’s a horizontal line that everyone knows is going to open to make room for the tongue slide. The mouth opens, people around me are screaming, I am screaming. My heart beats faster.

Miley appears in a yellow two piece with a matching feathered cloak. She stands at the top of the tongue and waves. Not a demure, queenly wave, a frantic “I AM SO EXCITED” wave. She slides down her tongue. She’s not graceful or coordinated but she is relaxed… Miley, sliding down her own tongue in front of thousands of people, is calm and comfortable. She tells us this is going to be a long show and that she’s excited to be using the props again (the tongue etc weren’t included in NZ or South America). She talks to us like we are really there, really listening, and you know it’s not a rehearsed speech.

Miley’s outfits are awesome, all bright, sparkly, and the majority with some cheeky buttcheek on display – I am absolutely dizzy over the amount of costume changes she has. Here are my top 3:

Miley's Greatest Outfits

  1. The Rainbow Princess – Complete with noodle hair.
  2. The Full Lieewwwkk – I wore Di$count Universe’s pink eye halter (pictured top) so was pretty psyched to see her sporting the same Melbourne label.
  3. The Uncle Sam – Worn for her encore performance of Party in the USA. The teeth really take this look over the edge.

I also need to give an honourable mention to Amazon Ashley’s “Adore You” rainbow butterfly wings and the double denim dancers.

Tessa and Ashlea, along with many other adoring fans, throw their gifts on stage for Miley. She picks almost all of them up; Stuffed toys, flowers, lollies, marijuana. If they are wearable, she wears them. Apparently Miley likes Tessa and Ashlea’s gifts so much she posts them to her Instagram:

Miley's new wigs

I was relaying this news to my Mum the next day.

“So you know what Miley Cyrus likes? That’s not really a good thing is it?”

Don’t hate, Mum. I know that Miley isn’t afraid of being a little silly and making fun of herself. I know Miley knows that if anyone can pull of a hat with braids, it is she. I don’t know why people go on about Miley trying to be sexy. Miley’s costumes are not sexy and she doesn’t think they are either. They are rhythmic gymnastics meets toddler beauty pageant (her fave show is Honey Boo Boo) and she wears them with fierce integrity.

People also go on about how Miley’s antics distract from her talent, but I don’t know if I agree with that either. There are certainly antics, a lot of them, but I get the impression that that’s honestly how Miley is rather than being a desperate plea for attention. She’s hyperactive and a little bit crazy, but she’s been on display and on the receiving end of public criticism since she was in nappies so I am surprised she still functions. Sure, when Miley performs the “Bangerz” from the album they are rowdy, messy and don’t do justice to her voice, but she’s having the time of her life. Bear in mind that this is a show she’s had to perform repeatedly since February – if you made her stand still on a stage in a ball gown singing ballads, she would be bored – if you had a say in whether or not you were bored at your job, would you choose boredom? That’s not to say that she doesn’t do any “serious” singing, because she does, and she’s undeniably good at it, putting most of today’s pop singers to shame.

I am not a Smiler, I don’t have the “Cyrus Virus” but I had the best night at her concert. I was entertained, overwhelmed and totally under her spell. Next time Miley comes to my city, and every time after that, I will be there.

On a scale of “Leave Britney Alone” to “What’s a Miley?” – how do you feel about Miley? Comment below and let’s discuss like rational human beings. 

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